some of myfavourite polar bear jokes

i found this great website for polar bear jokes so here are someo f my top picks:

Amaruq (while looking at Irniq in the hospital bed): ”So there it was… this HUGE polar bear… just laying there… and Irniq says, ‘Do you think its dead - or just asleep?’”

Tourist at the hospital: ”I heard that bear bells were good to have if you’re hiking in polar bear country. The hard part was getting them on that bear!”

Q: You have to paddle your kayak across water where dangerous polar bears swim. How will you do this without becoming polar bear lunch?
A: Just paddle across - all the polar bears are at the big animal meeting - don’t you remember?

Q: Have you ever seen a man-eating polar bear?
A: No, but down at the restaurant I once saw a man eating chicken!

theres loads more here 

(Source: bloodfeasthalloween)

A FILM BY SAMAYA HAWGHAN

ravenalexisxxx:

Cancer bear wanted to say fuck off to chemo and go to Disneyland, but I said no.


i met raven at the consumer electronics show in lost wages and she and her man were lovely, he put me in a taxi when i indulged in too much free shrimp* *alcohol and was bumping into security who would have loved an excuse to shoot me (probably). and i think raven even said she liked my stripey jumper but i might have imagined that

ravenalexisxxx:

Cancer bear wanted to say fuck off to chemo and go to Disneyland, but I said no.

i met raven at the consumer electronics show in lost wages and she and her man were lovely, he put me in a taxi when i indulged in too much free shrimp* *alcohol and was bumping into security who would have loved an excuse to shoot me (probably). and i think raven even said she liked my stripey jumper but i might have imagined that

(via ravenalexisxxx-deactivated20111)

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SMOKEMON

blumpkin

blumpkin

autocorrect i hope

today a stranger asked me for directions

right by london fields station. he said: “what way is it to a better life?” and i didn’t know what to say. i was going to the pub.